Why aren't you a Trump supporter?

I can read

I know that sounds DO NOT cause cancer.

I actually pay taxes

Marchand nets 2OT winner as Florida evens Finals - ESPN

I know the difference between “give me your tired, your poor” and “they’re poisoning our blood”

I know who the president of Turkey really is

I understand that you can’t just fucking nuke a hurricane

AI could unleash 'deep societal upheavals' that many elites are ignoring, Palantir CEO Alex Karp warns - Fortune

I understand geography enough to know that Belgium is not a “beautiful city”, that Paris is not in fucking Germany, that India does share a border with China, that that border is peppered with Bhutan and Nepal, not “Button” and “Nipple”, that time zones exist, that “shithole countries” do not, that “England” and “the UK” are not the same thing, that you cannot build a wall in Colorado to keep out New Mexico, and that the Bronx is not and has never been “a very wonderful place in fucking Germany”

I don’t hide in my hotel room while everybody else keeps the appointed time and place because my hair might get wet

I don’t believe in asking the people of Iowa “how stupid are the people of Iowa”

Why is social media so anti-fee speech, and have they become total BS?

I don’t respect shameless hucksters who try to sell a vitamin where you have to mail in your pee

I respect other cultures and don’t respect those who don’t

I don’t cotton to rapists

Who writes and reads novels nowadays?

It’s uncool to lurk around teenage girls’ dressing rooms

I don’t buy bullshit

I don’t hold serial bankrupters in high regard

Are Hailee Steinfeld & Josh Allen getting married on May 31? - Buffalo Rumblings

I don’t pretend not to know who David Dooky is just because he can deliver votes

I know the difference between “George Bush” and “Jeb Bush”

When I go Greenland shopping and Denmark says no I don’t melt down like a fucking WIMP

What does it mean when we dream about demons, ghosts, monsters, etc.?

I have a reading level above third grade

I know the difference between Sioux City and Sioux Falls and even Sioux Center

I don’t watch or listen to advertising

Why don’t Jews regard Jesus as an important teacher or rabbi, if not the Messiah? Putting aside messianic claims, wouldn’t Jesus be one of the most significant Jewish teachers in human history?

I have an acute aversion to scumbags

I see through liars

I understand that when you lose an election you step the fuck aside and take it like a man rather than invade the Capitol while your loss is being made official just because you’re a fucking snowflake WIMP

Meghan Markle, Prince Harry mocked over ‘cringe’ delivery room dance video from Lilibet’s birth - New York Post

I didn’t get out of military service with fucking “bone spurs” that I paid a doctor to write

I know that he didn’t run against “Obamna”

I understand how hurricane paths work

Why do guys on dating apps often just first message "hey" or "hey how are you" instead of being more creative and unique? How do they think being a copycat will stand out?

I took the same Oath and took it seriously

I don’t believe there is a fucking “president of the Virgin Islands”

I respect women and don’t respect those who don’t

Why do very skinny girls get more male attention if it is true that men like curves?

authoritarians can get down on the floor and bite my ass, yesterday

I don’t believe the way to respond to a hurricane is to call a press conference to describe it as “wet from the standpoint of water”, to distribute Play Doh, or to stand at a podium throwing rolls of paper towels as if they were bottles of ketchup

Those are a few reasons off the top of my head. How ’bout you?

It sounds like WWE has an explosive angle planned for SmackDown - Cageside Seats

I don’t buy made-up stories of “thousands and thousands of people dancing on rooftops”

It’s uncool to set up soft porn pics with your own preteen daughter

I don’t believe that Saudi Arabia and Russia “will vedoop bedeep uhhhh”

What can you do if someone makes a false accusation against you?

When a reporter declines to join me in the rooftops fantasy I don’t go on stage and gyrate to mock his congenital disability

I don’t call Tim Cook “Tim Apple” and if I do I don’t deny what’s right there on the videotape because I’m too much of a fucking WIMP to handle Reality

I can count

I don’t respect a sleazeball who lies about his height just so he can lie about his weight

I have complete contempt for intentional stupidity

If someone works for me, I actually pay them

I have no sicko desire to control women or have a bizarro hangup with “blood”

I don’t run and hide from a debate like a fucking WIMP just becuase some moderator asked pointed questions

I have complete contempt for fakery

I know that if I or anyone I know commits a crime we’ll go to the clink

I know what Nikki Haley’s authority with the National Guard is

Fuck that piece of orange shit, fuck his idiocracy, fuck his sexism, fuck his racism, fuck his religionism, fuck his divisionism, fuck his lying, fuck his orange face paint, fuck his worship of Cult of Ignorance, fuck his Cult, fuck his jingoistic horseshit, fuck his manuipulations, fuck his toddler-age WIMPism, fuck his fucked-up values of ME ME ME and did I mention ME, and fuck him personally with a giant razor sharp dildo that’s been preheated to 204.7° F and built to the dimensions of the Washington Monument. Slowly.

I’ve never tried to pretend the word would means wouldn’t

I don’t believe Nazis, Klan klowns and white supremacists chanting “Jews will not replace us” comprise “very fine people”

I understand historical events enough to know there were no airports in the eighteenth century, that Canada didn’t burn the White House half a century before it existed and that World War Two already happened

I know there’s no such thing as invisible planes

I have complete contempt for fraudsters, and even less for repeat ones

Let us count the ways. Captain Obvious says:

I have complete contempt for traitorism

A real man doesn’t grab women by the p***y

I understand that you can’t inject bleach or light

EVEN FUCKING MIKE PENCE understands that